I Thought We'd Have More Time

On Wednesday May 29th, Kay's Aunt Nancy (Whittaker) passed from this life to be in the presence of her savior.  Kay and I and the three kids quickly booked flights for the funeral which was the scheduled for the next Monday June 3rd. Unfortunately, the Sams had a church retreat weekend and they could not make the trip.

Kay and I flew from Myrtle Beach through Charlotte to Akron-Canton, and the kids flew from Raleigh through Charlotte and then on the same flight to Akron-Canton.  We were hoping for that dramatic airport reunion in Charlotte, but maintenance troubles on the kids fights cause a significant delay and almost caused them to miss the Akron-Canton flight.  That is a whole other story but suffice it to say it involved a pregnant lady running through the Charlotte airport.

Anyway, the family asked me to speak at the funeral and I was able to share some memories from Kay and the rest of the family and most importantly to share the gospel. Below is what I shared at the funeral. 

---------------------------

I know it’s a cliché but with Nancy, I think you’ll all agree, “to know her was to love her”.  If there was a competition for the most likable person, Nancy would be hands down world champion in my book. A friend of ours even showed us a Facebook post from this week that expressed that Nancy was *Everyone’s* favorite teacher”. Some of you here even today have shared the same sentiment with me.

When Kay and I first heard of Nancy’s passing, we just sat and cried. Then through tears, Kay said “I just thought we’d have more time”. 

When we told our kids about Nancy’s passing, Faith sent us an audio recording of Nancy she had recorded from March of ‘22, and we cried some more. Part of the recording is Nancy telling the story of how she and Larry met - she described it as *Love at first sight! If you don’t know the story it involved Larry slicing off part of his finger and Nancy caring for him. In the recording she even referred to it jokingly as "Love at First Slice!". Let any of us know if you want the recording, and we’ll send it to you. It is precious.

Nancy meant a great deal to Kay and I and our kids. Whenever we came back to Ohio, we always looked forward to visiting Nancy and those visits with her at her house were a special part of our trips. We would just sit and chat, listening to her stories as the time flew by. And at the end of the visit (many of you will know this) you could always count on Nancy saying "Now be careful as you pull out of my street!  It’s very dangerous!"

I recall one of our visits last summer, when we came up to Ohio for my great Aunt’s funeral (Aunt Helen - who coincidentally Rod knew and took great care of as she was his neighbor - thx again Rod) Anyway, that visit we ate lunch at Nancy’s house and then took her to see Dave & Sue’s (Kay’s parents) grave. And then we also walked her to see Larry’s grave. As Nancy hobbled over the uneven ground with her notorious bum leg with Kay and I on either side of her, she talked about Larry and how she missed him and would see him again one day.

Now, I married into the Klekner/Kinney/etc.. family, but Nancy made it clear to me early on that when you married into the family, you were a full-fledged member of the family. Family (and friends) were very important to Nancy and you all already know that Nancy was a mentor / parent to literally hundreds of young people. We don’t always immediately see Gods plan in our life circumstances, but the Lord surely had a plan for Nancy and the impact she would have on others. In the recording I mentioned earlier, Nancy even stated that she firmly believed that it was God’s will that they have no kids and that only her faith (and as she said, being a little crazy) carried her threw her cancer and leg cyst and Larry’s epilepsy and everything else this life sent her way. In the recording she even said that she considered her life trials as a message of hope for others.

So Kay and I have been reminiscing the last few days and I was reminded of some things and learned some new things about Nancy. Some examples that maybe you all can relate to are:

• Nancy was a picture person. She would label pictures and send them in the mail to us so we could be a part of things even though we lived away.  
• She was witty, a jokester, a family historian, and a story-teller extraordinaire! As I mentioned, our visits were always full of new stories - often even about some random stranger she had just met at the store.
• Kay also shared childhood memories of Nancy at Sunday dinners at Grandma & Grandpa Kinneys house with everyone around the dinner table eating roast beef and after dinner, playing a board game called Tripoli (including poker etc..). In fact, we just came across the old board game in Nancy’s closet yesterday.
• Nancy also made Kay and the other nieces and nephews 16th birthday scrapbooks which included 16 one dollar bills. We got the scrapbook out and went through it again and I’ll share a short poem Nancy included in it. The first letter of each line of the poem spells KAYANN. Nancy titled the poem “To a precious niece on being 16” and it reads:

Keep all the joy you now hold,

And life is sure to return it to

You, as you give to others.

Always serve God, and he’ll serve you.

Now that you are 16,

Never forget…the beauty of memories! They are a treasure no one can take away.  

(That last line felt especially appropriate to me as, nothing can take away our memories of Nancy.)

• Nancy also organized all the Ackerman family reunions at Sippo Lake Park (another example of the importance of family)
• Kay remembers going to Nancy’s plays when she was a drama teacher at Edison Jr high.
• Kay said Nancy even took her to Mellet Mall and introduced her to pralines and cream ice cream - which is still Kay’s favorite today.  
• More recent memories for us and our kids are opening Nancy’s Christmas presents which usually included silly creative wrapping efforts, gag gifts, as well as sometimes a search for hidden money in the package.
• Now, I have a question for all the family members! What food did Nancy always bring to family gatherings? ... Yes, Shrimp cocktail!!!  I would like to suggest a new tradition to remember Nancy at our future family gatherings. We should raise a shrimp and toast Nancy!
• And finally Nancy had a favorite color which was… ?  Yes, PURPLE!  Nancy loved the color purple - whether it was clothes, jewelry or whatever, she loved purple.  Kay’s favorite color is purple also and probably came from Nancy.

So the color purple got me thinking about the use and symbolism of purple in scripture. In the Bible, purple was typically a sign of royalty. With that theme of royalty, as a believer in Christ, God promised a crown of life to Nancy. James 1:12 says “Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.” And Revelation 2:10 says “Be faithful unto death, and I will give you the crown of life.” Well Nancy was faithful and is wearing that crown now.

  

In thinking about Nancy with her crown in heaven, I was also reminded of John 14. John 14:1-6 says “Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in me. In my Father’s house are many rooms. If it were not so, would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you? Then Jesus said, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” Scripture also says that the way is indeed narrow and very difficult in our own strength. But if we realize that the way is simply to follow and put our trust in Jesus (indeed the way *IS* Jesus), then he has that room prepared for us. I take comfort visualizing Nancy in her room now, in heaven, with Jesus, with Larry, and maybe even with a little cardinal sitting outside the window.

Nancy knew her savior. And at that very moment on Wednesday when she passed from this life, she knew him fully, and face to face. Yes, the way is narrow, but the way is simple also. Romans 10:9 says “if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” Believe and confess. It’s that simple. No good works are necessary. It’s simple and easy.  

Furthermore, Ephesians 2:8-9 says: “For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.”

Finally, I pray that each of us in this room, understands and accepts that free gift of grace that Nancy knew (and now fully knows), and that this would be her lasting legacy.

Thanks Nancy for your Limitless Love, your Constant Caring, and the Many Memories. Love ya Nan!

----------------------------

Nancy's Obituary and the Service Recording are at the following link (don't know how long the funeral home keeps these active):  https://www.paquelet.com/obituaries/Nancy-L-Whitaker?obId=31670921#/obituaryInfo